The Time Is Now

I spent at least two months a year with my grandmother growing up. She was integral to my understanding of the world. She and my aunt were unmarried for the vast majority of their lives, and were, for a long time, the only extended family I intimately knew. Thanks to them and my mother I bloomed, hoping to grow tall by their seeds of emotional self-sufficiency and overall magnetic ambition to make a better world. They depended on no one to move forward and practice goodness in their own ways. Only recently have I understood the gravity of this. I wish I had asked my grandmother more questions.

Our grandmothers, grandfathers, older friends and family are our memories of the world. Through wars, depressions, bigotry and sacrifice, they have lived. They’re not perfect; neither are we. But who are we not to listen to them? Who are we not to try and understand where they come from, who they are and what they’ve done? They made it here for a reason. We all made it here for a reason.

It’s hard to encapsulate here what I have learned from working with this demographic. I have learned a huge lesson in empathy. I have learned never to judge a book by its cover. When you meet somebody in this black-and-white day and age, so much is quickly assumed about us all. We are all shaped by our upbringings, circumstances and shortcomings and we are all challenged to peer over the walls they have built. When we do, we become a unified front, cauterized by the forges of human experience. I’m not sure everyone hopes we will be. The idea of a unified front threatens the forces in our world who thrive on our disconnect.

I urge you to take this opportunity to ask more questions. Learn from the humans around you. The ones you admire, the ones you live with, the ones you see every morning in the market. The tiniest thing you learn might grow to be the most significant. I task my caregivers with this quest as well. When they are in the homes of your loved ones, we advise them not only to understand their needs, but who they are as individuals including their social history, their favorite music, where they have lived, worked and dreamed. More often than not, our caregivers hear stories that stick with them for months and years to come. So, give human stories a chance to be heard, give all of human life a chance to be remembered. There is good all around you. 

By Rio Calais, Client Relations Specialist

Whether your loved one needs assistance only a few hours a week or around-the-clock, our team is happy to help! Call (347) 462-9001 to learn more about the transition care services offered through ComForCare Home Care (Brooklyn South, NY).